I don't know about you, but when I go through a break-up, it's scary. My friends fear for all of our lives because obviously they have to be with me as I travel to Black Out Town every night.
If you're more graceful at these things..... I wanna say good for you but mostly.. HOW?!?!
I fully support this list of all the mistakes questionable decisions we make.
1. Impulsively buy the sheerest and tiniest dress you can find, the highest shoes, and head out. You look good, you might make him jealous, but you'll definitely fall down and show your goodies.
2. Change up your hair. Sometimes this is a good change, sometimes it's an obvious "OMG I NEED A CHANGE" sign.
3. Rearrange your furniture or decor to help get rid of the memories. The memories won't go away, btw.
4. Get drunk and shamelessly flirt with the friendly man bartender you see every weekend at your go-to bar. You've never once found him attractive, but OOHHH LOOK AT HIM NOW!
5. Sign up for an expensive exercise class package, go maybe twice, feel guilty until the package expires. I do applaud your motivation.
6. Force yourself to go out to dinner alone way before you're mentally prepared for it. You're all like I'M AN INDEPENDENT WOMAN NOW LOOK AT ME! But then you're sad. and you're eating enough for two people and drinking enough for four.
7. Download not one, but four dating apps. You're obviously going to find the dream man that your ex was not in just a few swipes.
8. Start a playlist that is a mix of BLEEP YOU, I'M BETTER ON MY OWN songs and thank goodness I'm not the only one who has cried this much over another human songs. You will sing them loud and you'll cry and then you'll feel empowered.
9. Decline friends' attempts to set you up. You'll say it's because you don't need a man, but really- you're just not ready for something so serious.